Birth Date: October 7, 1995
Height: 5'6”

Personality:    Cynical, neurotic, thoughtful, loyal

Favorite Food: Tuna

Food he hates:  Everything other than tuna

Favorite drink:  Chocolate milk

Hobby: Baseball, reading, writing, skateboarding, playing checkers with senior citizens

Catch phrase:  “That’s your opinion!”         

Profile:        Rodney Lake is the second child born to Jason and Susan Lake.  His siblings include; older brother David, younger sister Patti, and the youngest Lake sibling Lester.  Rodney is sophomore at Woodrow Wilson Prep, one of the most prestigious preparatory schools in the U.S.  After posting a 4.0 GPA his freshman year Rodney’s grades have taken a sharp decline.  He now posts a 2.0 GPA and has inexplicably quit the schools prestigious baseball team (ranked #5 in the country by Baseball U.S.A.) despite having been its undisputed pitching ace.  Once a gregarious hardworking student, Rodney now keeps to himself, all but ignoring his peers and speaking to teachers only when necessary.  The reason for his sudden change in behavior seems to be linked to Wilson Preps tragic loss in the State Championship game his freshman year (more information to come.

Relationships:        Having forsaken fellowship with his peers Rodney’s primary relationships now consist of the following:

Parents:                 Rodney fiercely seeks to gain his father’s approval due to his feelings of inferiority to his older brother David whom his father dotes upon.  While is Jason is mostly unaware of his son’s inferiority complex Susan Lake is Rodney’s biggest supporter and regularly takes time to rally his spirits.

David Lake:           Rodney views David as the epitome of human perfection.  Throughout his life David displayed a propensity for excellence in endeavors both physical and intellectual.  Rodney’s admiration for his brother ultimately turned into a fierce, all be it one-side, rivalry which came to a tragic end at Wilson Prep’s loss in the State Championship game Rodney’s freshman year (more information to come).

Patti Lake:             Patti is currently Rodney’s best friend and confidant.  Though somewhat put off by her maturity and intelligence, Rodney loves his little sister dearly and spends a great deal of time with her.

Lester Lake:           Lester is Rodney’s rebellious little brother.  Lester’s propensity for getting into trouble is matched only by his ability to get Rodney into trouble with him.  Rodney regularly chastises or pummels Lester for his juvenile activities and often finds himself the victim of his elaborate pranks.  Despite their differences Rodney secretly admires Lester’s assertiveness and independent spirit.

Senior Citizens:     Rodney despises his peer group at school and has taken up playing checkers with the residence of his neighborhood’s senior citizens community village.  The seniors regularly regale him with stories of the cities past which have heightened his civic pride and partially formed the basis for his hatred of Crimson’s current mayor, A.H. Fury.

Abilities:               Rodney is a gifted writer of poems and short stories.  He is also an extremely talented athlete, especially in regards to baseball.  At the age of 15 he is already capable of throwing a fastball in the low 90’s (mph) along with an assortment of other off speed pitches.  Rodney is a gifted conspiracy theorist able to develop multiple elaborate theories in a short period of time.

Ambition:             Rodney’s current ambition is to flunk out of Woodrow Wilson Prep, or “Stepford Prep” as he calls it, and attend a “normal” school.  He also seeks to unravel the mystery of how Hitler managed to return from the grave (if indeed he ever died) and become the Mayor of Crimson.

RODNEY FUN FACTS

• Rodney tied the world record for most strikes-outs in a 9 inning game by and armature pitcher.  He holds the record with his older brother David.
• Rodney has eaten tuna with or for every meal since the age of 8.
• Rodney can read a book and navigate pedestrian and street traffic on his skateboard at the same time.  How he does this is currently not known.
• Rodney was born 2 ½ weeks premature.
• Rodney was born in the frozen food section of the Colossal Food Store two blocks from his house.
• Rodney’s middle name, Aloysius, is taken from Aloysius Hancock, the butcher who assisted in his birth.
• Rodney only watches NHK and BBC news broadcast.
• Rodney believes that Crimson’s mayor, A.H. Fury, is Adolf Hitler reincarnated.
• Rodney can throw approximately 6 different pitches, 4 or which have been described as “plus” pitches.
• Rodney hates all animals and refers to them collectively as “beast.”  This attitude stems from the trauma of being “betrayed” by his pet salamander Stymie when he was 10 years old.